The blue sky calls my eyes to its pale and silent grandeur, inviting me to inspect the clouds and treetops. I admire a bird whizzing. The sounds of nature mix with the soft and distant sounds of humanity. All is at peace. And yet I must check my phone, because I hear a little ping.
What begins as an alert to select my weekly meal subscription plan turns into an absent-minded perusal of my newsfeed, and all of a sudden my heart is racing.
Let me go to a different app, or a different news source, or better yet, let me check my social media accounts! I need to get my mind on another topic, pronto. Another triggering headline or image, one after another, until I have to put my phone down. Eventually, I take a deep breath, and lift my head to look out the window, where I see the soft blue sky, still in its calmness, inviting me to just be…
The New Normal?
We’ve all been there before. Flooded with information about people, events and situations, some halfway across the world, we can’t help but react with a defensive, fight-flight-or-freeze response. And there’s a simple reason: we just weren’t built for this.
Digital technology has reshaped our entire society. Companies use manipulative tactics to maximize our attention to their products, alienating us from each other and from ourselves. Not only does this produce a profound and deepening sense of loneliness, but we slowly learn to exist in a near-constant state of vigilance as we guard ourselves from the next “attack”, the next source of negative energy to commandeer our attention against our wishes.
How Mindfulness Helps
The next time you hold a phone or look at a computer, notice what you are doing. You are beholding a portal to another world. And that portal can lead to some pretty cool stuff! Just take a look at InnerNow, for example 😎. However, many companies get us to “pay attention” to their little place in the portal by dialing up the fear… because we are vulnerable when we are fearful. We crave answers. We want safety and security, so we keep checking in, and yet we don’t feel any better.
Fortunately, we don’t have to play that game. Before we open up the portal, we can pause, recognize what we are doing and make a more deliberate decision. Do we want to enter into the world of current events, of important but often fear-inducing messaging, or are we simply bored? Are we simply letting our mind wander back to old habits? When we are mindful we can recognize our behavior as either intentional or habitual and revise course if our habits no longer serve us. We can pause, breathe and go for a walk outside or smile at a loved one. In that moment, we reclaim our calm and our power.
We’ve included some wisdom below, inspired by our new Meditations for the Moment program with Jennifer Johnson.
Arrive in the Body
If your mind enters into one of those cycles of fear, anger, or despair, the body is the fastest way out. Allow your breath to settle loud thoughts. Let yourself sink into each breath, fully supported, fully alive. That’s a nice feeling. Can you truly savor each breath that nourishes you? Gradually, gratitude and peace will begin to replace more challenging emotions.
While breathing mindfully, feel the ground beneath you. Maybe you’re sitting, or perhaps you’d rather lie down. Feel the support that the Earth offers to you always, either through your furniture, through your floors, or through the soil. The Earth is there for you, always.
Truly “feel” yourself, wherever you are. Tap into those calming sensory anchors. The nervous system needs rest.
Listen Instead of React
When a reaction to a difficult moment seizes you, can you pause and notice how you are feeling? I know that it is difficult, but with practice it is very possible. When you observe yourself, try exploring the tension in your shoulders. Is your breath shallow? What emotions have you been carrying throughout the day without realizing?
Self-awareness can slow the “chain reaction” of spiraling from negative emotion to negative emotion and can actually lift you into a blissful state of peace. Maybe that negative headline is just what you needed to “wake yourself up” and recognize that you truly are grateful, joyful, and alive.
Practice Loving-Kindness
Your nervous system responds to feelings of connection and compassion for others. When you feel stressed out, the practice of loving-kindness helps to remember that other people are suffering too and can benefit from your sentiments of love and compassion and as a result, you will feel calmer and more at peace with the moment.
Self-Compassion
When we feel overwhelmed, we tend to get hard on ourselves. You may think things like “Why did I read that?”, “Why am I so anxious?” or “I should just ignore this!” Through meditation, you can observe your thoughts and allow them to pass by without judgement. When you notice your thoughts, you can see how harsh you may have become and can return to a place of self-love. An attitude of self-compassion may produce difficult feelings at first—but in time, this is one of the most powerful ways to let your nervous system heal.
Soften Resistance
Acceptance is a very powerful word, and it can sometimes feel intimidating. But we do not need to accept everything. Only what’s right in front of us in the present moment, within and without. Check in with your breath and notice how you are feeling. If you’re anything like me, you might have an instinct to regard your own thoughts as somehow wrong or flawed.
But what if you chose not to resist them? Notice the ways that you are clenching and holding onto judgement. How are you resisting? Allow yourself to soften in this space of awareness and just be. Just be. Breathe.
Rest in Open Awareness
Now that you’re watching your thoughts more closely, let them continue to reveal themselves, one after the next. It’s all quite interesting, really. A bit strange, a bit silly, a bit unexpected. But it can facilitate a transformative mindset shift. Rest in this space and notice how your awareness begins to swell far beyond yourself as your thoughts seem to shrink in stature.
Remember the Now—It’s All We’ve Got
Before long, you may need to go tend to your family or run an errand, or perhaps answer an email. Go forward easy, with peace. You may be presented with challenging stimuli. At first, they may take you away from your center. But mindfulness practice is about remembering. Always remember the now because that’s all we have. As you move through life with awareness, your stillness will grow and your breath will deepen. You will feel more and more “in the now.”
We wish you a peaceful and joyous Now.
Find equanimity in hard moments with Meditations for the Moment, a 7-day program with Jennifer Johnson, available now in the InnerNow App.